So this is the second installment in my opinion of friendships. Do I believe that being friends with a guy is the best way to go into a relationship? well honestly that depends on who you are trying to be friends with. If you are trying to be friends with someone who I described in part 1 then no matter how hard you try no matter what you do it will not work. It will end in not only a broken heart but a broken friendship. Believe me a broken heart is hard enough to handle but add to it the loss of a friend someone that you talked to daily trusted and sought advice from and its like you have lost a limb as well as a heart. 83% of women polled said they felt it was possiable to be platonic friends with a man but also over half of those women admitted to secertly lusting after that male friend at one point or another of thier relationship.
. Falling too fast doesn’t work
Often people jump into serious relationship quickly and into a bed too without getting to know each other well or at all. It feels great for a short term but it distracts them from really knowing each other on an intimate level. Sex is an expression of intimacy and commitment for each other so it will do well if one works on being friends first. Yes, a short run of “just sex” might very well work for you, but realize that the chances of a committed relationship may not be so great.
Sex isn’t enough
Most couples break up if sex is the main factor in their relationship. A man and the woman have to be compatible and find out if they connect emotionally as well and this is not possible if they are meeting only for sex. Likely the man or woman will find someone who fulfills them outside of the bed sheets as well, and pick them over the occasional booty call. If a connection in the bedroom is great, imagine that with a great guy who you respect and trust too!
In any relationship developing the bond of friendship is very important because it shows that a couple is comfortable and honest with each other. This makes the progression to next level easier and the relationship will be successful because certain quirks or habits that might annoy you in a booty call partner, is actually endearing because you understand where it comes from. Being a friend sets the table and gives a solid opportunity to exchange important information as likes, dislikes, information about family and friends, pet peeves, favorite vacation spots etc. After that is established, the intimate part is icing on the cake.
Excitement and passion
There is excitement and desire to please the other person when a mutual trust, respect and tolerance for each other is created from a friendship. There is an element of romance and attraction that is absent in casual sex when you come into it with more feelings and emotions attached to the person. When your goal is to please each other you tend to enjoy your time together more which helps solidify a strong, healthy bond.
As we live in a time when many relationships seem doomed to end in a revolving door of partner swapping, few of us hold out much hope of ever celebrating a golden wedding anniversary. That’s why trust is key to the transition from friends to lovers. After all, if trust is established, you’ll be more likely to believe your relationship has a chance of longevity and will feel uplifted with this possibility. Women tend to crave security and with a mutual trust and understanding, a relationship built from a friendship has much better odds of lasting and will therefore comfort her.
You’re good for the long haul
Although sexual attraction is very important to a relationship, unfortunately that drive biologically fades and you are left with more time spent out of the bedroom. In this case, don’t you want to really get along with your partner and be able to look back on what brought you together and how great the courting phase was? It’s important to have a basis of friendship so that you can always fall back on the fact that you two were brought together because of common goals, wants, desires, or interests. If sex is all you’ve ever had to bring you together, a level of resentment can occur if the relationship goes south and there will be very little glue to stick it back together.
Don’t get me wrong I am not saying that a FWB relationship is a bad thing. If you are just getting out of a long term thing and need something to hold you over go for it. Just go into it with no expectations and there will be little to no regrets. (Hopefully) If you are a hopeless romantiac like me then avoid the FWB like the plague because no matter how hard you try you are going to develop some sort of romantiac feelings and get hurt.